A Good Weekend

I have realized so much and have learned so much about myself in the past few weeks, it's just coming to my mind as I am writing this. I knew I had potential to be the person i am becoming and have to be, but didn't know how it would feel or affect me emotionally. These past few weeks have been so much to take in it's unbelievable, I have been saying to myself how much of a roller coaster life has been lately. I cant tell myself enough how proud I am to have the people I have in my life that are there for me. My current situation as of tonight is that as soon as I'm done writing this I am off to the motor home which is a 20 min. drive away now because it has been moved to west hills. Out of the schechters Steve, Justin and Donna have continued to live at Lillie white (the cleaning office). Lauren and I have been staying in west hills at the motor home the last week. But tonight i go to the motor home alone. Debbie who owns Lillie white and the motor home want myself and the schechters out of both places by tomorrow and we have yet to find a place. Tomorrow is a big day, we are to move, and the plan is that we stay at a motel till we find a house for lease. Things should turn out ok, it's time that we separate from Debbie's help.

This weekend was really good in the fact that i learned more about myself and the relationship between T and I. I'm one that tends to be drama free, and deals with emotion in a way that I can keep myself stable. I know not to bottle things up, but I tend to not always let it all out...



Babe-

I don't know how much you realized you proved this weekend to yourself and I, without you not needing to prove anything. I think this weekend was very emotional for us both, ups and Downs. Only you know what I mean, but With the prom situation I took it in way I had to express to you, and you really thought it through well, not just that, everything that happened this weekend. How i felt was my own problem, but i know you understood why. Your intentions were good and only that, I had realized this right away. I have 100% trust in you and in us. It was something that had got to me, that shouldn't have to that degree. This is where I learned a little about myself. You asked me if you could fix what you did, and I told you that "it is what it is, and that you really couldn't." But I was wrong. you fixed it in a way. We both learned a little something here. What you did was ok in your mindset, and meant no harm. Once again I realized this right away, but I had mixed emotions about the way you came across. You have chosen to only go to our prom, which is ok too. I have always told myself I would never stop you from doing anything you wanted to do, this is true even if it's something that can be hard to take in. The choices you make and the things you do will always be yours, and you will know my honest feelings about it...and Vice Verse. I don't know how you did it but you made me feel so much stronger about us when I keep thinking how we could possibly get any stronger. All i know is that you were able to do this by the way you handled the whole weekend. The influence you get from your parents at this age is very powerful still, and has a great impact. I know that you have completely followed your heart and continue to do so. You put allot of thought into everything from your emotions to the little simple things in life. All I know is that you will follow your heart wherever it takes you babe. As far as us I couldn't be any happier, the bumps in our relationship no matter how big, from our current situations to your mothers view of me is the true test for us..But like you said earlier, an overall easy one. When it comes to being proud of who my girlfriend is I couldn't be anymore proud and thankful. Our conversation today when we first met up and sat down after getting our drinks, (about the current situation with your mom and I) I saw something in you. You were so strong with your feelings and so sure, more sure and confident about what you had to say than you have ever had to say about anything. You have been there for me and I know you always will be, you have been so strong and I see you growing allot and maturing so much. We are both doing this together, and I just feel proud and happy to fall in love with someone as special as you.

you mean the world to me..

..Forever and Always